Archive for control

One By One

Posted in Meanderings, Poetry with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 26, 2009 by 1writegirl

One by one
I pull them out
Write them down

Dissect them

My fears that keep me
Prisoner

Some petty
Some deep seeded
Some uglier than others

Some caked in blood
Forty years old

Some small
I fear I’ll get a cavity
And not have the money
To fill it

Closest to the surface
Easiest to find

Some large
Not wanting
To see the light of day

I fear I’m not worth loving
If the one I want
Doesn’t want me

All of them need
Recognition

It’s slow
Tedious
Painful
Exhausting

They resist
They come out
Kicking and screaming
Comfortable
In their darkness
In my denial

They rejoice
In quietly
Consuming me
Like disease in a
Passive host

But I dig them out
One by one
And let them crawl
All over me
Call them by name
So I can see them
For what they really are
From whence they came

My only chance
At dissolution

My only chance
To find my
Peace
Within
Rather than without

To release them of
Their power over me
And set them free
Free to go

One by one